By Stacey Longo
How I Dumped My Ex-Boyfriend’s Body (2014) is a fun indie movie full of humor, buddy antics, and little people. (Okay, only one little person, but he steals every scene he’s in.) This low-budget flick is worth every minute of your time.
Maxine (Meredith Phillips) calls her BFF Shae (Vanessa Leigh) at an ungodly hour to beg her for help. Shae rushes to her best friend’s house, and finds Maxine sitting on the kitchen floor, distraught. It turns out Maxine has murdered her own boyfriend in the midst of a lover’s quarrel. Oops!
Shae is upset, of course—Maxine hit the guy over the head with a vase Shae gave her years ago, and now it’s broken. Maxine is more concerned with what to do with the body. The duo tries to take care of the problem themselves: they dig a hole in the back yard (until a nosy neighbor asks what they’re doing, to which Shae hastily responds “making porn”). They take the corpse for a ride, only to get pulled over by a bicycle cop (a scene in which Phillips will have you laughing so hard you’ll need to take a potty break). Eventually, they decide to talk to Shae’s cousin Mikey (Ed Gutierrez), a wanna-be gangster who sends them to Tony (Josh Pineo), who of course would be happy to get rid of the body. It’s only after Tony—a mobbed-up little person in a wheelchair, who conveys an impeccable “you don’t want to screw with me” attitude that would make Joe Pesci envious—disposes of the corpse that he then informs them of the price tag: $10,000. Now the ladies and Shae’s bumbling boyfriend, who has now somehow gotten roped into this misadventure to emphasize the strong bonds of friendship between the two girls that no man can break—in other words, “chicks before dicks”—must raise the money, fast. The ladies’ misadventures continue as they try their hands as muggers (and fail spectacularly), then explain in side-splitting detail to cousin Mikey why, exactly, they don’t want Tony to come back and turn them into sex slaves. Eventually, there is a hilarious climax and reveal that I won’t spoil for you. Suffice to say this movie was silly, funny, and a little bit sick.
Phillips and Pineo were the clear standouts in this gem of a B-movie. Phillips was unapologetically inelegant and fantastically funny. Her comedic timing and can’t-help-but-like-her attitude were fabulous. Pineo’s performance was baleful and belligerent—not for one moment did the audience think he couldn’t put some serious hurt on our two leading ladies, dwarf in a wheelchair or no. The rest of the cast played their parts well, and I laughed out loud through several scenes. If you have eighty minutes to kill and you’re looking for a good time, How I Dumped My Ex-Boyfriend’s Body is the perfect answer.